Archive for parody

A Long Time Ago in an Immune System Far Far away

Posted in Science, skepticism with tags , , , , on October 4, 2009 by Northernskeptic

One of the problems with combating misconceptions of science is placing the concepts within an easy to understand frame for the recipient. Take vaccination for example and the belief that vaccines contain the virus itself which will make people sick anyways. This is just one of many falsehoods that are spread by the anti-vax movement but it might be one of the easier ones to dispel with a simple analogy.

Let’s start with a disease; we’ll call it the Galactic Empire.

The Galactic Empire is spread by the Death Star Virus or DSV for short.

A vaccine was developed for the DSV, it was called the R2D2 shot.

The R2D2 vaccine contained the plans for the DSV but not the actual DSV itself.

Alderaan was in the at risk population for DSV but did not receive the R2D2 shot, and so was susceptible to terminal infection. Additionally the DSV infection was allowed to spread.

Yavin 4 was also at risk however the R2D2 shot was delivered to the immune system which we’ll call Rebel Headquarters.

Rebel HQ examined the DSV plans delivered by the R2D2 shot, which in turn allowed for the development of the X-Wing anti-bodies plan of attack.

When the DSV was introduced into the Yavin system Rebel HQ released its anti-bodies en-mass. The X-wings were keyed to locate the DSV’s Thermal exhaust port, and deliver their proton torpedo payload.

After the attempted infection started it was quickly thwarted and the DSV was destroyed. The added benefit was that since it was gone it could not spread to other systems and so they were protected from infection by a mutual immunity.

Eventually the Endor strain of the Death Star Virus was discovered, fortunately early inoculation with the Bothan Spy Shot quickly brought that outbreak under control before it became widespread.

A Song for a Friend

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , on December 4, 2008 by Northernskeptic

I wrote this for a friend who has had an incredibly stressful time recently.  This one is for you Des.

Skeptic’s Rhapsody (Tune Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen, with utmost respect to Freddie Mercury)

This is the real life
This is not fantasy-
On late night TV
No time made for reality-
Open your mind
And think Critically like me-
I’m just a skeptic, I need no sympathy-
Because I won’t buy it from a quack
Reasoned thought is on attack
Anything the woo sells, smells just like a scam to me,
To me

Sylvia  just lied again
She said “your son is dead,
Your desparate search has been misled”
Sylvia making lots of cash,
With Montel Williams right there on TV
Sylvia ooo,
Won’t  admit she lied-
But She’ll be back again same time tomorrow-
Carry on, carry on to Rob Lancaster’s web site

Peter, he claimed to heal
Heard from a voice above
Claimed he channeled godly love
But soon everybody-was bound to know-
His wife was broadcasting it from the booth-
Peter ooo-(What a douchebag)
I don’t want to die,
But you will never get a penny from me-

I see Uri Geller racheting a key
“I don’t know how I do this, now please give me some money”
But if he’s not faking, the cash is for the taking, see-
There’s a Challenge, There’s a Challenge
There’s a Challenge, There’s a Challenge
There’s a Challenge, from James Randi don’t you see
“but I don’t believe you so I’m going to sue you”
He’s just a loser, after YouTube users
Spare him a life of undue scrutiny
“Money’s tight if you know-, will you let it go”
You Scammer! no-, we will not let it go- let it go
You Scammer! we will not let it go- let it go
You Scammer! we will not let it go- let it go
We will not let it go- let it go
We will not let it go- let it go
no, no, no, no, no, no, no-
Don’t you see, don’t you see, don’t you see, you need to know-
James Randi has had a Million set aside for years, for years, For Years!!!!

So you think to cold-read, spoon-bend and lie-
So you think that this BS I’m ready to buy-
Oh Scammers-can’t do this to me scammers-
Just got to think, Just got to think Critically

Thinking really matters,
Skeptics do believe,
Thinking really matters-, thinking really matters to me

Anything the woo sells…